Maybe I do...
After all, i dont try as hard as i should. I dont have many responsibilities. My own girlfriend must think im the worst, hardcore slacker boyfriend ever. She doesnt think i try... and she's probably right. I feel like i try, but does that count for enough? Doubtful... I fucking suck at school and i do terrible in my classes, EXPECIALLY the ones im really excited about, like those in my major. Im debating switching majors to something less intense because it seems that what i WANT t do requires someone whos a little smarter and better motivated individual. i dont have a job or a fucking liscence. And all i truly seem to like doing is sitting inside playing the same games over and over because I KNOW that i WILL SUCCEED at them with little effort. I feel like i hardcore fail at life ad everyone today has been telling me to get motivated and do this and do that and try harder and ALL this shit has been attacking me at once. The day has been overwhelming, exhausting and emotionally draining on many different levels. I have no clue what to do except breakdown.
So much is being expected of me lately, and i feel like its crushing me. I just dont have the motivation and personal drive that my parents/I want and need me to have.
I know i just need to try....be it in school, relationships, whatever comes my way. I need to find that personal drive deep down... i MUST find it. because i dont want to be a failure all my life. I would like to do great things or help people out... but im just not sure if i know how. Christ, at 20, you'd think i'd get this down by now.
,,,,
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Monday, March 30, 2009
Only Zombies could truly make this day perfect....
Oh My Freaking Hell! I am having the best day that I've had in a fuckin LONG time. Such excitement prompted me to frantically blog asap. I must warn my readers, for there are some intense moments of nerdiness that exist in the next paragraph. You've been warned.
Firstly, there was an earthquake. A magnitude 4.3 to be exact, at around 10.40 this morning. Being the second earthquake that I've actually felt in my lifetime, and the very first Ive felt since deciding to become a Geologist, I 'fell' out of bed. And by that, i mean i rushed to my computer and began casting 'Lvl 12 Rapid Turbo Push' on my F5 key when i logged onto the United States Geological Survey website, eager to get the results of the quake. It was at this moment that a figurative and literal lightbulb went off in my life. My roommate turned on the hallway light, not only blinind me when i walked out, but also allowing me to 'see the light' about the future that i want for myself. I'm going to be a Seismologist. And no, i wont define it. That's what Google is for, however, its not a terribly complex definition. Therefore, load your IE or Firefox and look it up if you feel so inclined. On another note, if you've been paying even a slight amount of attention to this paragraph, you'll realize exactly what it is.
Next, I went to Philosophy class, with is quite humorously taught by Jesus. Unfortunately, its pronounced 'hey-sus', but its funner to say 'Jee-zus' teaches my Philosophy class. If he was aware of this, he might be really funny and offer snack in class, like Jeez-its or something. [That one's for my Dane Cook/Hoover people] He handed back our Midterms [High B, sha-wing!] and our Philosophological Comparison papers, which contained nothing but comments regarding my 'brilliant and descriptive writing'. And apparently I 'supplied excellent concrete details and a positive, well-reinforced counter argument'. I guess he liked it or something, cause i think my score looks very similar to a 97%.
And then I went to Geology/Paleontology. Learned about all kinds of brachiopods, including the six types of Articulate species... oh i wont bore you with them. Be advised, however, they were fascinating, and unique with terrible complex names that sound like someone sneezing in Latin. [Yeah, thats pretty much covers it]
And with no class tomorrow, I'm gonna play Resident Evil 5 [Xbox360] and Pokemon Platinum [Nintendo DS] till i pass out. PEACE!
>>>END TRANSMISSION
Firstly, there was an earthquake. A magnitude 4.3 to be exact, at around 10.40 this morning. Being the second earthquake that I've actually felt in my lifetime, and the very first Ive felt since deciding to become a Geologist, I 'fell' out of bed. And by that, i mean i rushed to my computer and began casting 'Lvl 12 Rapid Turbo Push' on my F5 key when i logged onto the United States Geological Survey website, eager to get the results of the quake. It was at this moment that a figurative and literal lightbulb went off in my life. My roommate turned on the hallway light, not only blinind me when i walked out, but also allowing me to 'see the light' about the future that i want for myself. I'm going to be a Seismologist. And no, i wont define it. That's what Google is for, however, its not a terribly complex definition. Therefore, load your IE or Firefox and look it up if you feel so inclined. On another note, if you've been paying even a slight amount of attention to this paragraph, you'll realize exactly what it is.
Next, I went to Philosophy class, with is quite humorously taught by Jesus. Unfortunately, its pronounced 'hey-sus', but its funner to say 'Jee-zus' teaches my Philosophy class. If he was aware of this, he might be really funny and offer snack in class, like Jeez-its or something. [That one's for my Dane Cook/Hoover people] He handed back our Midterms [High B, sha-wing!] and our Philosophological Comparison papers, which contained nothing but comments regarding my 'brilliant and descriptive writing'. And apparently I 'supplied excellent concrete details and a positive, well-reinforced counter argument'. I guess he liked it or something, cause i think my score looks very similar to a 97%.
And then I went to Geology/Paleontology. Learned about all kinds of brachiopods, including the six types of Articulate species... oh i wont bore you with them. Be advised, however, they were fascinating, and unique with terrible complex names that sound like someone sneezing in Latin. [Yeah, thats pretty much covers it]
And with no class tomorrow, I'm gonna play Resident Evil 5 [Xbox360] and Pokemon Platinum [Nintendo DS] till i pass out. PEACE!
>>>END TRANSMISSION
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Zombies, Games and Vampire Weekend
So I've realized that Ive had a weekend that was kinda, pretty much the most incredible weekend I've had in a long time. It was comprised of: friends, the epic madness of killing zombies in video games with friends, zombies, friends dressed as zombies, considerable amounts of fake blood and fantastically shoddy acting, fake British accents, overcrowded car trips to Dennys and mediocre Grand Slamwhiches at said Dennys, as well as a small handful of scattered 'F' words and copious amounts of over exaggerated, dramatic situations that would otherwise be considered mundane and typical.
The days before break were filled with mini-papers and midterms. Thats all I'll say about that.
As far as the actual break goes, its almost over, but its been nice and relaxing. I plan to head back to SJSU tomorrow, Wednesday, because there are several things that i must give my attention to. As for tonight, I plan to massacre the living hell out of zombies in Resident Evil 5 [[ exbawks 360, I'm no Sony fanboy ]] and watch Shaun of the Dead with the 'rents tonight. Because other than the amazing, life changing short film that i took part in, my parents know nothing of SotD. And this ghastly circumstance must be ratified on a big screen tv later tonight after dinner.
Other than that, things are good in life. I recently got around to downloading more Vampire Weekend. Good music there, its upbeat lyrics and catchy tunes are enough to keep me listening, aside from the great band name. You should check them out.
>>> END TRANSMISSION
The days before break were filled with mini-papers and midterms. Thats all I'll say about that.
As far as the actual break goes, its almost over, but its been nice and relaxing. I plan to head back to SJSU tomorrow, Wednesday, because there are several things that i must give my attention to. As for tonight, I plan to massacre the living hell out of zombies in Resident Evil 5 [[ exbawks 360, I'm no Sony fanboy ]] and watch Shaun of the Dead with the 'rents tonight. Because other than the amazing, life changing short film that i took part in, my parents know nothing of SotD. And this ghastly circumstance must be ratified on a big screen tv later tonight after dinner.
Other than that, things are good in life. I recently got around to downloading more Vampire Weekend. Good music there, its upbeat lyrics and catchy tunes are enough to keep me listening, aside from the great band name. You should check them out.
>>> END TRANSMISSION
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Clearly, I'm a melting pot of random thoughts.
Life is a curious thing.
On an unrelated note, today is Tuesday, the day before Wednesday which coincidentally just happens to be the day before the Resident Evil 5 Zombie March/Midnight Launch. So I’m excited about that. Other Zombie festivities are taking place on campus, such as the incredible remake of Shaun of the Dead and they also have me pretty stoked.
As far as school and the world of academia, things are fine. I feel like I have most of my stuff organized and all that jazz. So what if I don’t go to ever single class meeting. Isn’t the final grade/end result the only thing we all care about anyways? Sigh, I’m trying, what do you want from me?
I still feel as if there’s something missing, and I can’t even clearly type them now, so don’t ask me to explain. It’s like an untouchable, invisible ‘something’ and I can’t quite pinpoint it. But I feel as if it’s something that which I desire more than anything, something that I desperately need to have yet it is always out of my reach.
Perhaps I’m simply restless, and bored of waiting for the next big thing to happen in my life. Or perhaps my zombie fascination has allowed my mind to subconsciously wish for a post-apocalyptic lifestyle. Whatever it may be, it haunts me. And there is nothing that confuses and frustrates me more than an unknown, yet very present item that is always out of my reach and accompanied by the lack of means to get it. I don’t know…. I feel happy now, I guess. Or maybe I’m not happy at all. Regardless of my status, that ‘item’ still eludes me. I unrealistically wish that I had more control over my life or more specifically, time, so I could possibly obtain this mystery item. Maybe just fast forward a year or two and take a peek into what my life holds for me in the future. That would be nice, because the simple fact of not knowing what is coming next is enough to drive me insane.
So I’ll keep the keep the melodic trance and the hardcore gaming going till I can find that which I require to be satisfied and whole. And as far as discussions regarding said mystery item... dont expect anything other than vague messages and ramblings. You dont know any more about the future than me. If you did, then we could talk.
>>> END TRANSMISSION
On an unrelated note, today is Tuesday, the day before Wednesday which coincidentally just happens to be the day before the Resident Evil 5 Zombie March/Midnight Launch. So I’m excited about that. Other Zombie festivities are taking place on campus, such as the incredible remake of Shaun of the Dead and they also have me pretty stoked.
As far as school and the world of academia, things are fine. I feel like I have most of my stuff organized and all that jazz. So what if I don’t go to ever single class meeting. Isn’t the final grade/end result the only thing we all care about anyways? Sigh, I’m trying, what do you want from me?
I still feel as if there’s something missing, and I can’t even clearly type them now, so don’t ask me to explain. It’s like an untouchable, invisible ‘something’ and I can’t quite pinpoint it. But I feel as if it’s something that which I desire more than anything, something that I desperately need to have yet it is always out of my reach.
Perhaps I’m simply restless, and bored of waiting for the next big thing to happen in my life. Or perhaps my zombie fascination has allowed my mind to subconsciously wish for a post-apocalyptic lifestyle. Whatever it may be, it haunts me. And there is nothing that confuses and frustrates me more than an unknown, yet very present item that is always out of my reach and accompanied by the lack of means to get it. I don’t know…. I feel happy now, I guess. Or maybe I’m not happy at all. Regardless of my status, that ‘item’ still eludes me. I unrealistically wish that I had more control over my life or more specifically, time, so I could possibly obtain this mystery item. Maybe just fast forward a year or two and take a peek into what my life holds for me in the future. That would be nice, because the simple fact of not knowing what is coming next is enough to drive me insane.
So I’ll keep the keep the melodic trance and the hardcore gaming going till I can find that which I require to be satisfied and whole. And as far as discussions regarding said mystery item... dont expect anything other than vague messages and ramblings. You dont know any more about the future than me. If you did, then we could talk.
>>> END TRANSMISSION
Friday, February 20, 2009
A King has his Duties
This blog will be maintained. I have no clue how often, but it shall be updated as frequently as possible.
So some recent happenings have, well happened. SO the list is as follows:
1 angry, fucking pissed off King of Normandy
1 confused Dell Technician
1 broken, busted and/or failing LCD monitor
4500 angry zombies that still need to be killed
1 lengthy, reminiscent and somewhat frustrating AIM conversation
1 game profile worth of Pokemon that need to be trained
1 metric shit-ton of techno/trance that is currently being used to relax me
1 set of plans for future living arrangements that include
4-5 students/friends that all have their own preferences
And despite the twisted roots of this Tree of Life trying to drag me down, there's 1 possible something nice that keeps me sane....
This chaotic life is fucking nuts sometimes. I think some scientist seiously needs to get to work on that Solanum substance. A world wide infection epidemic of the Solanum virus is, in my opinion, an interesting catastrophe that could bring the world to realize whats really important: survival and existing without petty arguments. Take life for what it is, because you might be stuck in the perpetual death that is a living corpse.
Perhaps these wishes are lost on reality, but as disastrous as it sounds, the idea of a full blown World War Z sounds thrilling as fuck. I'm not wishing for a zombipocalypse for the sake of using highly powered weapons and machetes in order to get a bloody kill count. And im not so sick in the head that i wish for millions of innocent people to die [even though our world is waaay overpopulated] Im simply interested in how the world would handle such a devastating circumstance, and more specifically, the aftermath of the entire situation.
Perhaps one day.
Perhaps...
>>>END TRANSMISSION
So some recent happenings have, well happened. SO the list is as follows:
1 angry, fucking pissed off King of Normandy
1 confused Dell Technician
1 broken, busted and/or failing LCD monitor
4500 angry zombies that still need to be killed
1 lengthy, reminiscent and somewhat frustrating AIM conversation
1 game profile worth of Pokemon that need to be trained
1 metric shit-ton of techno/trance that is currently being used to relax me
1 set of plans for future living arrangements that include
4-5 students/friends that all have their own preferences
And despite the twisted roots of this Tree of Life trying to drag me down, there's 1 possible something nice that keeps me sane....
This chaotic life is fucking nuts sometimes. I think some scientist seiously needs to get to work on that Solanum substance. A world wide infection epidemic of the Solanum virus is, in my opinion, an interesting catastrophe that could bring the world to realize whats really important: survival and existing without petty arguments. Take life for what it is, because you might be stuck in the perpetual death that is a living corpse.
Perhaps these wishes are lost on reality, but as disastrous as it sounds, the idea of a full blown World War Z sounds thrilling as fuck. I'm not wishing for a zombipocalypse for the sake of using highly powered weapons and machetes in order to get a bloody kill count. And im not so sick in the head that i wish for millions of innocent people to die [even though our world is waaay overpopulated] Im simply interested in how the world would handle such a devastating circumstance, and more specifically, the aftermath of the entire situation.
Perhaps one day.
Perhaps...
>>>END TRANSMISSION
Monday, February 16, 2009
The Beginning...
...is a good place to start. For starters, my name's Cory Short. I'm an avid gamer, a word which here means 'plays for insane amounts of time'. Gaming is my life. There is nothing more satisfying than relaxing in my room playing my favorite games alone or with friends. And which would be my favorite games, you might ask? I'll play anything except games that resemble those old school arcade fighters. Other aspects of my life include the following: Currently attending San Jose State [3rd year], I listen to an incredible range and amount of different music [No country!]as well as watch a metric shit ton of movies, mostly of the horror/thriller genre. I live and breathe anything zombie related be it games, books or movies, and I hope to one day become a Geologist. Other future aspirations include: wanting to live comfortably, owning a cat, nice house, hottie wife etc. Typical American dream, minus the Super Size Happy meal and the white picket fence. [Well, maybe i'll have a fence.]
Things you will typically see in posts: Current games i'm playing, video game banter and lingo, utter randomness spawned by my own thoughts and/or by the insanity of spontaneous events with friends that trigger the birth of brilliant and/or completely retarded quotes, as well as anything else that deserves to be included.
>>>END TRANSMISSION
Things you will typically see in posts: Current games i'm playing, video game banter and lingo, utter randomness spawned by my own thoughts and/or by the insanity of spontaneous events with friends that trigger the birth of brilliant and/or completely retarded quotes, as well as anything else that deserves to be included.
>>>END TRANSMISSION
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